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Monday, 1 December 2008

Roll on 2009

Although Karen Bishop is no longer issuing her regular energy alerts for those on the spiritual path, she continues to post answers to commonly asked questions via her website, What's up on Planet Earth, for which I receive updates.

One of the most recent questions was particularly pertinent for me, since it seemed to address many of the issues that have concerned me of late; stomach problems, anxiety, feeling disconnected and unseen. Those on the path have been reading for months of how things would start to improve, yet the opposite seems to be true, as everywhere I look there is nothing but bad news. I know that I am not the only one to be feeling this, as friends both on and off the Internet tell me the exact same thing.

As Karen explains, anxiety occurs when we are no longer in the higher vibration on the outside that we are on the inside. In other words, when we move from an area of high vibrational frequency into one that is lower. Depression can also occur, and is in fact to be expected. As I have discovered, with the move from the old store to the new (the old store being on a much higher frequency) this mis-match of energies can be horrendous and throw us totally off balance, leaving us rudderless and with no direction at all.

The store closure and the events that led up to it, thrust me into a new and alien space, which to begin with at least, felt very uncomfortable indeed. I experienced this as feelings of worthlessness and confusion, feeling lost, invalidated, unappreciated, and downright useless, as there was so much that was new and unknown. This is not surprising when you consider the momentous shift that had occurred, not just for me, but for the planet as a whole, as there was a major energy shift for the whole planet at that time. It is no coincidence that the closure happened when it did. Others felt this too, in their own way, and it helps to know that I was and am not alone.

It felt as if all my foundations were crumbling and I had lost everything I knew. I found myself asking what in the world was happening, was I in the right place, did anyone even care what I thought and felt and what difference did it make? The visit from our Area Manager last week, who did not even look my way, only served to highlight this. There was no respect and no acknowledgement for the work I have put in and what I had to go through. I felt invisible, as if I did not matter at all, to him or the company as a whole.

Karen says that during the most recent shift, which occured when my store closed, we had to reclaim any parts of ourselves that we had put “out there” and begin to pull back. The old roles of assisting and placing our energy there to support others are over and no longer needed.

So now what? Is there anywhere left to go? Thankfully yes. We (meaning those who read Karen's alerts or are otherwise "on the path") were the first to begin the ascension process, and are the forerunners who held that space for others who were yet to catch up. It is like the parable in The Bible where the workers who did half an hours work earned the same as those who worked all day. They reap the benefits of our hard work. While they caught up, we had to stay still holding that space and waiting for them. Now they have caught up and we have not moved on, we are still in the same space. We feel like there is nowhere left to go, that we are boxed in on all sides by lower vibrating energies, that everything out there is ugly and dark; repulsive to all that we know and represent (this is a perfect description of what I have been feeling at work for months). The analogy that Karen uses is like a reformed smoker having to stay in a room full of people smoking for 24 hours.

I have evolved way beyond that point and want to move on - now! It feels like I am hemmed in on all sides and have nowhere to turn. No wonder I feel depressed and anxious and no wonder I spend my time looking back to the old store and everything that happened there, as it is tempting to see this as the cause of my anxiety. It is in part, but only one part.

When you are surrounded by what feels like darkness, it is very difficult to see your way through, in fact it is difficult to see at all. We do not see what is right in front of us. I was thinking the other day about what happened with my windscreen and the fact that the rear view mirror fell off. The rear view mirror represents the past and what is behind us, while the windscreen is our view of the world, representing our future. The fact that both cracked signifies that I need to stop worrying about my past and future, and look to the present, for this is where true happiness lies, it is after all the only moment we have. Once I do this, I will see a world of infinite possibilities begin to unfold.

My endurance (and patience) have been tested to the limit this year and it is time I had some good news. Despite it all, I am still here kicking over the anthills and plodding along. The next few months will be equally challenging, and slowly but surely things will reconnect. Karen says that 2009 will be the year of new beginnings, when we begin to turn the corner and reap the rewards of all our hard work.

Our new roles will involve what comes naturally to all of us. They will be easy and effortless and what we know the most about - what then do I know the most about - many things, but most of all looking after people. This role is no longer needed, since we have moved beyond to the point where we no longer need to serve. Those who need our help will arrive and simply ask, so I can rest assured that if I do remain in my current role, I will get the customers I need, and the sales, without having to try; they will be there at the right time for me, and I at the right time for them, helping each other. Because of this, and because I am more centred and grounded, I will be seen and respected for the person that I am. I will be free to create a new reality, any reality that I choose, including a new job.

Roll on 2009!

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