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Tuesday, 28 October 2008

Change - the only constant in the universe

A few days ago we moved into the sign of Scorpio, which happens to be my rising sign - that is, the sign of the zodiac that was over the horizon at the time of my birth. This is the outer face that we present to the world. At the same time, I also received the last energy alert from Karen Bishop. Karen has been sending these alerts to those on her mailing list (which I joined about a year ago) for seven years now, and I am sure they will be missed.

Her work is though done, as we have moved into a different phase where we can support ourselves and no longer need to rely on guidance from others. A huge shift has taken place these last few months, for both myself and humanity as a whole. The archives on Karen's site will still be available, and she will continue to write and add updates to her new site, but there will be no more energy alerts, as they are no longer needed.

What she had to say in the last alert was very appropriate for Scorpio, and one paragraph in particular struck a chord with me:

"Going into the masses now, before the time is right, will result in some fairly unpleasant scenarios. Much of the time we will feel invisible, invalidated, not heard, diminished, dis-respected, and basically as if we do not even exist. Lower vibrating energies cannot “see” higher vibrating energies, similar to angels existing in the non-physical plane, and this is what will indeed occur when we attempt to jump back into old energy. It will be enough to make one want to flee and never return."

I have felt a lot like this of late, particularly at work, where a lot of the time I have felt invisible - unseen and unheard. I get the feeling that once at the new store this will change - one of two things will happen - it will either get a lot worse, or a lot better, depending on me.

During the Astrodynamics evening tonight with Sarah Jane Grace, I received the following words:

"It is not change or the threat of change that unbalances me, but the thought of staying where I am. The more willing I am to embrace that change, the greater the potential for growth".

Never a truer word spoken, or in this case, channelled.

Tonight we worked with Scorpio - a sign that I am very familiar with, my chart being top heavy with water. The Sabian symbol for the day was as follows:

"A massive rocky shore presents its unchanging face of the centuries to the furies and coaxing calms of the sea".

This brought to mind the idea that the sea shapes the landscape through the forces of erosion that constantly wear away the land. In the same way, we are also shaped by what life throws at us, yet beneath it all, the spirit remains the same. The trick is to step back from it all, and rise above so that we are not affected by these base emotions that are so familiar to Scorpio types. The rock can be seen as us, and the water the ebb and flow of life.

Scorpio is a volatile and changeable sign, just as water (the element that it falls into) is also volatile and changeable - from stormy seas to the calm of a country mill pond. Water can also be mysterious, since no one knows what lies beneath its depths. It represents the psyche, the collective unconscious that binds us together, that Scorpio's are very much in tune with (I know that I am). It also represents the emotions and hidden depths - the idea of a volcano paints a good picture of what Scorpio is like, with the power hidden deep beyond the surface, every so often bursting forth . There is a touch of the dramatic with Scorpio people, who feel very deeply and intensely, too much so, as I know to my cost.

It is the least understood of all the signs with three different levels - the scorpion, the eagle and the dove. The scorpion represents the base emotions, which are linked to our survival instinct - sex, death, birth and so on. The eagle soars above these emotions as it begins to attain spiritual (and self) awareness. When we get to the dove, we have reached the state of enlightenment or detachment, where we are no longer affected by the emotions, but can see beyond to the bigger picture of what life is all about.

Key words for Scorpio are: pride, endurance, indestructible, possessiveness, emotionally close, sensitive to others, devoted, self sacrifice, compassion, defensive, enigmatic and destructive - these are all traits that I see in myself.

Scorpio has two rulers - Mars, the god of war and champion of the underdog (again very much like me, since I declare war on anyone who does not treat me properly), and Pluto, the planet of change and transformation. It is interesting that the US elections take place, in one of the most powerful nations on Earth, at this time of year, while the Sun is in Scorpio. Whatever the outcome, it will have far reaching consequences for all, and energetically, it is no coincidence that I booked to go to Lundy at this time.

Some very odd ends

As we enter the last week of trading at work, the store is looking in a rather sorry and dejected state, with very little stock remaining. There are a few odds and ends (and some of them are very odd), and that is it. On Saturday my Manager and I joked that we should put a sign on the door stating "Jumble Sale" as customers rummaged through bargain bins filled with various oddments. So many customers have asked me why we are closing and what is to become of me, that I am considering going to work on the last day with a sign round my neck stating, "Today is the last day, the lease ran out, I am transferring to another branch!".

Today and tomorrow are well earned days off to write, walk and enjoy the early winter sunshine. Ten days from now I shall be back on my beloved island of Lundy, where I plan to do a lot more writing.

Wednesday, 15 October 2008

The common cold - a symptom of grieving?

Yesterday, as the day wore on, I became aware of a soreness and a tickle at the back of my throat - tell tale signs that a cold might be on the way. When I woke up, the tickle was still there, confirming my fears - right now is not a good time to be taking time off from work, no matter how tired I might be.

A cold is usually a sign that the system is becoming overloaded - and one look at Debbie Shapiro's excellent book 'Your Body Speaks Your Mind' confirms this. Page 184-185 reads:

"There are many different versions of the common cold although the symptoms usually include a runny nose, watery eyes, stuffy or painful sinuses, a sore throat and sometimes a cough. It may start in the chest and move up, or start in the nose and move down [for me it usually starts in the nose]. In all cases, it occurs most often in those whose immune systems are already in a weakened state, perhaps due to overwork, stress or emotional issues. A strong and healthy immune system will not easily succumb to a cold, even when surrounded by those who have.

When we cry, our nose runs. When we have a cold, our eyes water. Colds, runny noses and crying are all related. We often feel the same helplessness and despair, the same need for comfort. Tears and mucus are both ways of releasing emotions that have been pent up inside. So, if you have a bad cold, you may want to see if there is some crying or grieving you are repressing [what was I saying about grieving for my soon to be old job yesterday], some deep feeling that has been pushed aside. Unshed tears will find their way into the nose, whether due to sadness, frustration or guilt. A cold often follows the death of a loved one or some form of emotional shock, particularly if grief is not acknowledged; it may imply that we have gone emotionally cold or are being cold to our feelings. Colds are common, just as it is common not to show how we really feel.

Are you frustrated at work and unable to express this? Or are you feeling mentally and emotionally overloaded - to the point where the pressure is overwhelming [yes to both]? A cold not only releases the feeling but gives us a few days off - the time we need to find our balance. It also makes everyone else keep their distance. Are you actually wanting to push someone away? Feeling fearful of intimacy? Are you in need of some time out to be with yourself? A cold can be a cry for love and attention, a need to be cared for, to be mothered. Are you longing for comfort but unsure of how to ask for it? Or a cold may indicate a time for change and transition [see What's up on Planet Earth for details of this], when there is too much happening at once and we need to shut off for a while, slowing down [natural at this time of year, when like the animals, we too are going into hibernation mode] our intake to allow for assimilation."

I am sure that many can relate to much of what Debbie has to say - I know that both my partner and I can. Like I say though, it is not a good time for me to take time off, with the closure in a little over 2 weeks. Still, it only 3 weeks (and 2 days) until I am back on my beloved island of Lundy again ...

Tuesday, 14 October 2008

Divine order

With less than three weeks to go until our store closes, and having spent two days now working at another nearby store, I was still not (until yesterday) happy about the transfer. I thought long and hard about why this is, and discussed it with my partner and two good friends.

It is always difficult to be still and tune in when you are in the midst of emotions, as I often tend to be (as Sarah Jane would say, too much water and not enough air - she is the other way around). My friends, plus of course my partner, know me better than I know myself and saw that the real reason for the resistance was nothing to do with the fact that the staff are younger than me, or the fact that it means a change of routine (although this does play a part). No, the main problem is energetic - i.e. the energies of the store and that sector of retailing in general are just not right for me. It is in short the total opposite of everything that I stand for (privately at least anyway) - pandering to egos and wants rather than needs, and at my current store, at the moment at least, the need for gossip ("Is that right that you're closing - I think that's terrible").

I usually bite my lip and refuse to comment when they say things like that, while thinking "If you had supported the store a bit more and not demanded ridiculous discounts and so on, then it might not have happened." Oh yes indeed, what goes around comes around, and rather than the 10 percent (it has increased to 15 percent as of this week) discount being offered being an insult to the townspeople, as a certain blog site states, I see this as a lesson for them in five words - "use it or lose it". When it comes to my store, there will never be truer words spoken, once it's shut than "You don't know what you've got 'til it's gone". It won't matter to me though, because by then I will be gone too.

This job is in many ways the complete opposite of everything I hold dear. If I am honest, (and thankfully I can with my Manager), I have to say that I don't believe there is any benefit at all to much of what we sell - apart from its distraction value. I see the value in certain items, but these are few and far between. Most of what we sell is nothing but a distraction designed to close off the mind to what is going in within its murky depths, and stop us from looking at our 'stuff'. We all do that I suppose, but in different ways. Personally I listen to music, or eat chocolate, which is not that good (but very tasty).

As usual I digress. I was talking about my resistance to the transfer. The main problem I felt was energetic, but it was also to do with not accepting that my current store was about to close - this is only natural I suppose when you consider the circumstances, and there is, with any loss, a certain amount of grieving involved. What didn't help was not having the opportunity to talk to their Manager to find out about hours and so on. Yesterday though, when she came to the store to collect some of our stock, we finally had the chance to talk.

What she had to say changed my mind, and made me realise that maybe this is not such a bad thing after all. Basically I will get a 52p an hour pay rise due to London weighting (I wonder if I will get it for the 2 days I have already worked there?). I will also have to work weekends.

Now a year or so ago this would have been a disaster, but things have changed - I am no longer out there doing talks and book signings etc at the weekends, and so don't have to worry about having those days off. At the new store everyone has to work weekends; it is the only way to make sure that everyone is treated the same - what this means is three Saturdays out of four, and every other Sunday from 10.30 - 4.30 (you get paid for an eight hour day even though is it only six hours).

This also means that once every four weeks you have a long weekend off - four days in a row. Most people use this for weekends away, so that they in effect get extra holiday time. I can see that this could work really well for me, especially if I can time my Lundy trips around these times - for if I do when I won't have to take extra days off for driving to and from the ports.

I am feeling 100 percent happier and am actually looking forward to the challenge of moving now that is all sorted out. I think the Manager is the sort of lady that I could talk to, and that in time, we will develop the rapport that my current Manager and I now have. I do hope so. As for the Assistant Manager who suggested that we should tell the customers that our shop was to become a New Age shop just to wind them up, well, he will come around when he sees what this New Age stuff brings to my life. In my experience most people can be persuaded when they see the benefits ...

The latest energy alert from Karen Bishop, impeccable as always in its timing, also had some pearls of wisdom to offer. My own thoughts are in bold:

"The process of re-wiring or re-connecting to a new shore, or higher vibrating home involved a tuning up within, as well as a tuning up without. The economy here in the US is undergoing a similar process, which will affect the planet as a whole. And as we tune up within, we will affect the planet as a whole as well.

This is a massive transition… but as many of us are far ahead of the masses, we will be nearly untouched, as all our needs will be met with ease.

If you are one who has recently let go of connections to the old, you may now be finding yourself in a space of self-exploration, perhaps considering a geographical move, and wondering what your new role might be. Being still, exploring new options and passions, re-connecting to what it is that you really and truly have always wanted, and allowing things to unfold oh so naturally are your keys. "

When I think about the way in which the transfer happened, it was pretty easy and effortless for me. I didn't have to make endless phone calls and go out searching for a job, I just thought about which stores were nearby, and found that a job was there. Mind you, this doesn't mean that I have to settle in to it, and not consider another move, it just means that I am safe for the moment and don't have to worry - it gives me the breathing space to continue with my own transition to the next level or phase of my life - whatever that will be. And I know that that will be easy and effortless too, for the universe does look after you, if you allow it to.

"During these times, we are always taken care of. If we are in a phase where we are re-connecting to our authentic selves, or allowing that process to unfold, the universe is always behind us, supporting our needs until we are complete with our self-exploration. There is a road map for this process in Stepping Into the New Reality (more about it at the end of this energy alert), as this process is a key component of ascension, and will continue on for many who are on various rungs of the ascension ladder."

This then is about giving myself some space, and the money that I need to live on (supporting my needs) until as Karen says, I am done with my own self exploration. This comes in many forms - the newsletter that I edit, perhaps starting another book, the astrology course with Sarah Jane Grace, all of these things and much more. I know now that I have seen through the resistance, that this is where I am meant to be (but it doesn't have to be forever). If this is what the universe has given me, then it is clearly where I am meant to be, and whatever it is that you are doing in each given moment, forms your purpose for that moment.

"If your re-connection process is complete or near complete, you may find yourself in states of busy-ness, with too many projects to tend to, perhaps feeling overwhelmed, and with a seeming inability to complete just one. All in varying states of being half-finished and scattered. What is occurring here, is that we have one foot in one reality and another foot in another. And the realities are about setting our foundations, beginning those new projects, and tending to our supports until the new has arrived in full.

Because we have created our new connections, this begins then, a new phase or new energy current that wants to be utilized, while at the same time, we may still need to finish up some of the old in order to be ready and prepared for the new.

It is just a matter of overlaps while going from one place to another."

There has been a lot of busy-ness for me of late - dealing with the closure, the pressures of the newsletter, and my partners stuff (it was one month last weekend since the Stevie Wonder episode and his 'heart attack'). It has not been the easiest year for either of us. My partner is busy with work too, and has websites coming out of his ears ...

This then is the space that I am in right now. One foot in one reality (3rd dimension - work) and one foot in another (4th dimension - home, or life outside work). It is just as Karen says, about making sure that all my needs are met until the new has arrived in full. When that will be is not clear, and does not matter, for everything is as it should be. All is in divine order.

Friday, 10 October 2008

A crazy week as news spreads re the store closure

It has been a strange and surreal couple of days, which are as always, difficult to describe. It is frustrating when one has neither the time or the words to adequately convey what has transpired. Words are never adequate to describe what is in ones heart, as they are merely symbols that we use to describe our thoughts and feelings, and as such can never come close to describing what we truly feel.

Suffice to say that on Tuesday afternoon I had a rather intense healing session from my friend Sarah Jane Grace, where we attempted (and succeeded) at getting to the core of my block around communicating my needs at work. It turned out to be an energetic implant that was Atlantean in origin, having been placed not just in me, but 99,999 other souls too, my partner among them. It was put there to stop us from speaking our truth. This kind of figures when I think about it, for I have always had a problem with this, not being seen and not being heard - at least not by the people that count.
After the work we did, I think I can safely say that that spell is well and truly broken, and whatever my next job turns out to be, the situation will not repeat. Thank goodness for that, as I really could not go through it all again - it is far too draining - physically, mentally and emotionally, not just for me, but also for my partner who has to pick up the pieces and support me through it each time this occurs. He is breathing a big sigh of relief as well.

One of the other patterns I have noticed, which began around the time my book Genesis of Man was first published in 2006, is that whenever I am bottling things up - words or feelings, my right eye starts to water. The right represents the masculine or active self as opposed to the feminine or passive self; the doer rather than the thinker. When I woke up this morning to find that the right eye was watering, I therefore knew that there was something I was either not saying or not looking at that needed to be said or looked at.

My partner suggested that I listen to Jelaila Starr's latest video message on You Tube, which is on the subject of discernment. What she had to say was really simple, but got me to thinking. When we are a crossroads in our life and have major decisions to make, what we need to do is ask ourselves two very simple questions - what is our need, and what will happen if those needs are met. In my case I think it is more appropriate to ask what would happen if my needs are not met - the last time this happened I was signed off work for 2 weeks with stress.

I thought about this on the way to work and came to the conclusion that what I need is good work/life balance and the ability to control my environment rather than it controlling me. With our store closing in a little under 3 weeks, decisions have to be made about which branch I am to transfer to. I discussed this with my Manager again when I got in, and he told me that my first choice of store has no vacancies, so I guess that only leaves my second choice, where I worked last Saturday.
Perhaps my eye is watering not because I am unable to decide which branch to choose, for that choice has been made for me, but because I am uncertain as to what is actually being offered - what times/days will I be expected to work, how much more will I get due to London weighting and so on. This is my task for tomorrow then when I work at this store again for the second time.

Despite the lack of closing signs, news has travelled fast around the town with everyone looking for bargains. The last two days have been frantic - yesterday we took over £6000, this was the busiest day I have seen since Christmas. Of course the customers are not content with 10 percent discount offered, but are demanding in some cases up to 50 percent - needless to say, they don't get it, and most come back when they see that they can't get bargains like that elsewhere. I am telling everyone that the nearest alternative store in case of problems is not the one I am transferring to, so I don't have to sort out the mess if and when these things go wrong, as I can't be doing with that - once our store is closed as far as I am concerned, it is closed, and I want nothing more to do with it. As far as we are all concerned, the busier we are the better, as the sooner it means that we can go and start our new jobs.

Tuesday, 7 October 2008

Iceland in meltdown

For as long as I can remember, as a child, I wanted to visit the country of Iceland. I have no idea (that is not quite true) where this need came from, but I managed to visit for the first time at the age of nineteen, and have been back five times since. It is fascinating country, known as the land of fire and ice, that sits on the edge of several tectonic plates in the North Atlantic.

Iceland is a land of contrasts, from Reykjavik in the south to Myvatn in the north, which in the summer teams with bird life of all descriptions. In the midst is the desolate and windswept interior, a cold and at times inhospitable mixture of glaciers, volcanic lava and sand. Iceland boasts the second longest life expectancy in the world, and the world's highest literacy rates, with more books read per capita than anywhere else in the world. It also boasts the world's highest number of mobile phones and a very large usage of credit cards, with a virtually cashless society.

My last visit was in 2001, and I had been planning to visit again this summer just past. My plans were put on hold however until next year when my own job situation was more stable. With the current crisis in worldwide banking, which judging by the newspapers today has affected Iceland particularly badly, there may never have been a better time to go.

Iceland has a reputation for being one of the most expensive countries in the world - which may be true if you insist on being ferried around in air conditioned buses and staying in five star hotels. Thankfully I have never been of that persuasion, preferring to rough it with the locals and other budget travellers in youth hostels and guest houses. Thankfully there is no shortage of these throughout the country.

As someone who is not only vegetarian but also wheat free, I also find that it helps to keep costs down and control what I eat, by self catering. There is no shortage of such facilities in Iceland either, since the country lends itself well to back packers and budget travellers in general - I have always found that you experience so much more about a country when it is experienced in this way, getting closer to every aspect of the culture and people, not to mention nature, and this is (to me at least) what Iceland is all about. I have never seen the point in cossetting oneself in luxury five star hotels owned by foreign chains, and consuming imported food and drink, but prefer to support the economy of the country that I am for all intents and purposes a guest in. Since she gives me such a warm welcome, it seems only fair.

Iceland is in a vulnerable position, since most goods have to be imported, and her residents like to live very much on the edge, and are in love with their flexible friends. Her main sources of overseas revenue are fish, wool, a few minerals, and tourism - and it is a very short tourist season at that.

In some ways it came as no surprise when last week I read in the Daily Mail that the country's third largest bank Glitnir, had like Northern Rock in the UK, been nationalised and that this was threatening several British retailers, since the company that owned the bank had a large stake in many of these chains. The crisis was worse than we thought since it seems the second largest bank, Landsbanki Island, has now followed suit, and the Icelandic government has been forced to loan £400 million to the largest bank, Kaupthing.

The Icelandic Krona fell 30 percent in just one day, and has now been pegged at 131 against the Euro as an emergency measure, with the Icelandic stock exchange banned from short selling bank shares.

In an interview with The Daily Telegraph, Prime Minister Geir Haarde said Landsbanki's foreign operations – including Internet arm Icesave, had been separated from the domestic bank and it was likely they would be sold off. He described this as the worst crisis to hit Iceland for over a decade and added that it was "every country for itself. "

He went on to describe damage to the country's reputation as "a risk we have to take". He went on to say that the Icelandic people will almost certainly see a drop in their standard of living and the country will return to its traditional strengths in fishing rather than financial services. With dwindling fish stocks, I am somewhat less optimistic I have to say, than he is.

The Icelandic Financial Service Authority announced on its website earlier today that the country's second biggest bank, Landsbanki Island, was now in national hands, having dismissed the Board of Directors, and placed the company into receivership.

It was also announced that the country's largest bank, Kaupthing, will be given a £400 million loan from the Icelandic Central Bank, which yesterday guaranteed all savings for Icelandic customers. The bank will remain open and run as normal while these changes take place.

Meanwhile, Iceland's Financial Supervisory Authority has replaced the Board with its own Executives. Somewhat worryingly, Landsbanki's Internet banking arm, Icesave, which has thousands of British customers (many Icelanders live abroad, as they are prolific travellers) has stopped processing requests to remove money and taking on new customers.

The Icelandic Government were in emergency meetings at their headquarters in central Reykjavik on Monday night, united in a desperate measure to try and save their country's economy, so this was not a decision to be taken lightly. Mr Haarde indicated in a dramatic speech that he could not find an affordable loan from abroad that would not be disastrous for Iceland's public purse.

He warned of "chaos" if Icelandic banks stopped operating, and rushed through emergency legislative measures designed to stop the collapse of their banking system. Mr Haarde added: "A lot of the banks' business is in Britain, so it is likely that Britain might well be affected." Let's hope not. I hope he is wrong, but it strikes me that right now the Icelanders need all the help they can get.

If you like me are thinking of going (my trip will have to wait until next summer, since what holiday time I have left for this year is already booked and paid for elsewhere), then there are three airlines which fly from the UK - Icelandair, British Airways and Iceland Express. There are also several tour operators to the region, by far the best of which are Discover the World. I have travelled with this company five times before (four times to Iceland and once to Canada) and can wholeheardedly recommend them.

The country has a lot to offer, and although I have never been in the winter months, I know people who have, and they tell me it is an exhilerating and very different experience to anything else that they have known. So, what are you waiting for? Remember to leave room in your suitcase for me though - I am not very big and won't make a noise - I promise!

The Beginning of the End (but no reason to fear)

I have been on Karen Bishop's (What's up on Planet Earth) mailing list for a while now and have posted some of her stuff on here before, but the last two energy alerts, issued on 29th September and today, are particularly poignant given what is going on in my life.

I won't post them in full, although Karen says it is okay to do this, but just the bits that seem particularly important, with my own comments in bold.

Here then goes:

"Our transition from the old to the new continues on, and even though it may be producing fear and uncertainty within many, I can assure you that all is in divine and perfect order.

We are letting go of anything that is not pure and clean, or vibrating high. And we are thus going directly to Source. And this creates the necessity to learn new ways. And this is why we have recently been plugged in to our true and authentic selves...connecting more fully to our souls or to Source. And this is why so much of the old world in now falling away in earnest. And this is why we need to be very good at what we do. And this is why we are now ready to be who we came to be, have always known who that is (even though we think we do not), or are now getting the opportunity to discover who that is and get up to speed with it.

Our time is now. We are in the intense stages of the fall. This is the time we have been waiting for. This is why we arrived on this planet in the first place. This is why all our needs will be met and we will be OK no matter what is occurring in the “other world.” It was meant to be this way. We had to re-connect to our true and authentic selves right now more than ever before because of what is about to occur even more rapidly now. We are right on schedule and right on track.

As much continues to crash and fall, we will be called upon to offer our areas of expertise. In times past, much of the old world paid little attention to us. The continual crashing and falling of the old will thus create a summoning for something very new and better, as there will not be much to hold onto anymore. We are now being given the opportunities to prepare our store-fronts and to get much in order so that we will be poised to assist and share our wisdom and knowledge. This is why we experienced such a lull in recent times past. It was a gift for us…a time to re-connect. Our store-fronts are one way that we will be ensured financial security in these rocky times. And the remainder of the time we will be safe and secure in our sanctuaries, enjoying ourselves with all our needs met.

The fall will create unity. It will force individuals to come together and to assist one another. The earth and her inhabitants can easily provide all that is needed without the need for money, only we have been used to living as very separate entities and seem know no other way…until now.

When we are willing to connect to our true and authentic selves, to know who we are, and to provide this energy to the whole, then unity is ever present while we are more connected as well to our souls and to Source.

Although most of us are very aware that the old is collapsing because of the new and higher vibrations present, there are wonderful things that these higher vibrations produce as well.

Because it is now time for us to serve, guide, and assist, all our needs will be met. We will not be affected by what is occurring in the old world." Thank goodness for that. "Our needs are usually met, and many times we do not even know it as we are so used to feeling powerless, stuck, and unable to create. Being used to this state of being can at times allow us to accept without seeing what is right in front of us. We simply need to connect to a new and different way of thinking and being, and know that all solutions are there…all we need do is connect to them and get out of our own way and out of any beliefs that things have to arrive in a certain and specific way."

Ain't that the truth - when I think about what has happened this past week, with the way that things seem to have fallen into place it is really quite amazing. When I went back to work a week ago, I had all guns blazing, and marched in there with a letter detailing all my woes that I wanted to discuss. There were for all of 10 minutes, and I thought that nothing was resolved. How wrong I was as four days later we were given a closing date. I am sure that this would not have happened had I not been willing to look at and work through these issues.

"Another phenomenon many have asked me about is the situation with electronics. We are vibrating higher now than most electronics, so then, they seem to go haywire each and every time we make a vibrational leap. Before I left for North Carolina, my printer decided it would not work, my DVD player would not connect or work, my cell phone froze and I had to take the battery out and then put it back in, and light bulbs would blow whenever I turned on a light. This is all very common for the ascension process. It is simply a mis-match in vibrational alignments."

With new and higher vibrations now present, much is also magnified." Tell me about it! "If we were to get stuck in a victim consciousness, for example, that led us to believe everything was falling apart and we were powerless, we would then probably begin creating all kinds of situations that made us feel powerless and out of control. But if we are able to shift into something very new, with a new perspective, and know that we are always in charge (remember, we need to be more vigilant now than ever before), we would then begin creating and experiencing a much more pleasant reality for ourselves."

See my comment above re our store closure - the moment I shifted out of that victim mentality a miracle took place.

"We just have to get out of the snowball effect when we get in a funk. At times it can be challenging, as the old reality is so darned uncomfortable and it may seem that there is nowhere to turn that vibrates where we now are. But if we can know that we no longer need to hold up the old, that we are absolutely allowed to enjoy ourselves now more than ever before( as we have earned it and are now on the “other side”), that we can be in our creativity most of the time, and that we can have fun while we are waiting for the old to really come down, we will then find ourselves in a very new space indeed.

October will bring in some refreshing energies. The equinox on September 22 brought in energies that magnified things, stirred things up, and for some, placed them in spaces of their worst nightmares. This was simply the old coming to the forefront encouraging changes to be made, and in most cases, big nudges to leave the old behind…..and now knowing that it is OK to do that. The energies of the old can at times feel like a big vacuum cleaner sucking us in….the old does not want the light to leave! But the old must fall, and through this process, we can stay in our heavenly sanctuaries as we need no longer go back….the old must give up and eventually be willing to come to us for a new and better way.

So again, get ready for October as we will then be securely plugged in to our new outlets and ready for some new and supportive energies… all in our court!

There is more to come though with the latest alert posted today:

As the fall of the old world continues in earnest, varying scenarios are becoming more and more evident. If we can remember that we are smack in the middle of the end times, it can perhaps ease our minds that all is in divine and perfect order. The end times…we are in the end times…and considering this fact, I believe we are doing very well indeed.

As the transition from the old to the new continues on, we may thus find ourselves enmeshed in a little of this and a little of that. This grand process of ascension was meant to be gradual in order to create the most ease possible. So then, the more we find ourselves enmeshed in the old, the more difficult our lives can seem. And the more we find ourselves embodying the new, the easier and more effortless our lives can be.

The energies of the old are frightened now. They know at some level that they are leaving. In this way, they are becoming ever more difficult to interact with, as fighting, fear, nastiness, and an extreme effort to maintain some kind of control has the lower vibrating energies by the coattails. When those of us embodying more light begin our attempt at departing into the higher realms, our departure can be met with grasping and holding on by the old. Like a swimmer attempting to rescue someone who is drowning, the rescuer can easily be forced under and dragged down by the one who is drowning."

I have noticed this too, that there seems to be this underlying feeling of fear almost everywhere I go. People are fearful of losing their jobs, their homes and everything that is dear to them, and on the surface at least, with good reason. But, if you trust that the universe will support you then it does.

I have often wondered about why it is that I, as a light worker am working in an industry that is so enmeshed in the 3D reality and is so toxic and alien to everything I hold dear. I also wonder how I manage to cope with it all, in fact not just cope, but actually (some of the time) thrive. I believe that it is because of the path I have chosen. Namely that someone has to stay behind, in a sense to monitor over the darkness and keep it in check. I am the chink of light within the dark half of the yinyan symbol - monitoring it and acting as a symbol and a beacon to others who are trying to find their way out. It's a tough job, but someone has to do it!

"It is ever important now to stay out of what is falling, or we will go down with it. And when we stay out of it, we can easily find ourselves in spaces of magical synchronicities, a new unity with others, and a new reality where all our needs are always met.

We cannot bail out the old. We are in the higher vibrating energies now, and thus, there is no more energy to sustain and fuel the old. There is nothing left for it to hold onto. If we go back, we can easily get sucked under, turned inside out, thrown off balance, and become lost in a whirlwind of fearful and grasping energies. What is creating this now rapid fall is the simple fact that so many souls have now arrived on “the other side.” This joyous fact signaled the next phase resulting in the fall of the old very rapidly now….and it took nearly the entire year of 2008 to complete this latest phase.

Enough souls had to be on board…enough had to be ready to let go and leave the old behind. Those struggling to hold onto what must now depart are in a space of unpleasantness, most certainly. It is time to surrender to a new way.

And in this regard, our time is finally here. It is finally time for us to jump in…to jump in to the new…not the old. Who is in your space now? Whom do you find alongside of you? In what energetic space are you now residing?"

At this precise moment in time, because I have started to deal with all those old issues that I have resisted for so long, a very good one, although there is always more work to do. This afternoon I am seeing my good friend Sarah Jane Grace for some in depth work on a real deep level to really get to the bottom of everything that has happened at work, and make sure that the situation does not repeat, as I really could not cope with that. It is time that I put my feet up and had a nice rest in a job that did not have all these problems.

"Re-connecting to a new us, a new us with more and different responsibilities to the spiritual evolutionary process of the planet, has then ushered in these very new projects. In this way, all is in divine and perfect order. Some manifestations of this re-connection or new space can be felt as sleeplessness (as we now need to be here, more than ever before), various muscle pain, especially in the feet (as we are now very grounded here), feelings of pressure (as there is so much to do and these energies are arriving rapidly now), and even upper back and neck pain as we open more fully and connect to our angel wings."

Symptoms that my partner and I have experienced a lot these past few months, as have many others that we know, both on and off the spiritual path. It helps to know what is happening to you though - which is why tools like Karen's updates are so important.

"The key to staying centered and on the other side during the fall is to align with your creativity and passion." This is a very difficult thing to do when like me, you reside and work partly in the 3D world. I have though been spending more time in nature of late, and also with writing and drawing. My forthcoming trip to Lundy in November will also help.

"Staying in this space as much as possible allows for anything and everything needed to arrive for us all on its’ own. And even though it may be difficult at times to watch what is occurring now within the old, knowing that each and everyone there will have the opportunity to be where we are now, can give some comfort.

It is time to get ready with our store-fronts. These arenas of our service to others who are still on the other side will serve to sustain us while we are transitioning into a reality where money no longer exists." Is this what lies behind the recent crashes on the world money markets and the banking crisis? Is this the beginning of the end? The so-called ethical funds seem to have escaped the worst, so perhaps this is a lesson for us all.
"In hard times, there is always money available." Very true - I know this even more when people come in and pay cash for larger items without batting an eyelid. "This is an undeniable plan we created at soul levels, and thus, it will work." We just have to trust and have faith that all is well, and that we will be looked after. "In this way, we will all be fine. And when we are not involved on that dimensional border with our store-fronts, we will be interacting in unity with our brothers and sisters on the other side, having fun, enjoying ourselves, and having all our needs met in an effortless way as we each contribute to our very new whole.

We will all be right where we need to be. There can be no mistake. We were not meant to go down with the old. It is not part of the plan.

As we begin to connect very rapidly now to our new and very needed roles, the roads before us will open very clearly, and we will be united with our very new projects, very new people, and some very new ways. These are very exciting times indeed…and if we are willing to let go, the river will take us to a very new shore."

Thank goodness for that, as I can't swim!

Sunday, 5 October 2008

Which job should I take?

Time for a quick post before I catch the last episode of Tess of the Durbervilles.

What a busy weekend it has been! Following the news of our definite closure on Friday, I spent Saturday working at another nearby branch. The first hour or so was quiet, but as the day wore on, it got busier and busier. I was pleased to find that I ended the day as top salesperson - not bad for someone who doesn't even (as yet) work there.

I think I would be happy there, although I would rather work in a High Street if I can, with fresh air circulating around the store (this store is on the lower ground floor of a shopping centre). My other concern is that most of the staff are much younger than myself, so I might not have that much in common with them - the lady Manager is though my own age (just turned 40), and her Assistant Manager in his mid 30's, so that would help. He is though a very young mid 30's.

If possible I would also like to spend a day at my first choice of store before I really make up my mind, although the store where I worked today (my second choice) would not be an altogether bad thing. It would be a lot busier than the first one, although this is much closer to home, and also nearer to what I am used to - smaller and more personal, with a fairly laid back Manager (perhaps a bit too laid back - the second store is the other way around). Decisions, decisions. I am hedging my bets and continuing to look for another job - I applied for 3 today. If nothing comes my way before the closure, then I can always go to one of the 2 branches and use it as some breathing space while I continue to look. The universe as always will no doubt make the decision for me - if and when I am ready to leave a suitable job will be offered.

Today then was the usual trip to the gym followed by Harvest Lunch at the Village Hall, networking with various residents and group leaders. A very nice lunch it was too. Then on to Staples for some ink cartridges, and home for a heavenly cup of tea and to apply for those jobs. Some browsing on various writing sites followed, and a hot bowl of soup, followed by an even hotter bath.

Tess calls so over to the television ...

Friday, 3 October 2008

We have a closing date - at last!

I was halfway through my lunch today when my Manager came upstairs to tell me that his boss had just rung to confirm that we finally have a closing date - Saturday November 1st. I felt a strange sense of calm and peace - and a huge relief. It feels like a ten tonne weight has been lifted and everyone spent the rest of the day smiling. The fact that it happened so quickly after I showed willingness to confront my issues shows me that the universe is pleased with my efforts, and that I am beginning to get through this so that I can hopefully move on.

Tomorrow I am going to work at another nearby store (my second choice for a transfer) to see how I get on and whether or not a transfer is the right thing for me. The only way to know after all is to spend time actually working there. The Manager will not be there, but her deputy will be, whom I met last time I went in. It is worth transferring I feel even if nothing comes along between now and then, as it will give me some breathing space to find something more suitable. I will of course continue to look around - there were 3 jobs in this weeks local paper that sounded interesting.

It won't seem real until I actually see that closing sign go up - at which time the customers will be in there like a pack of vultures fighting over the scraps. What fun that will be. Exciting times ahead!

Wednesday, 1 October 2008

Facing Change

As my partner had a visit from a client this afternoon, and I had the day off, this provided me with the perfect excuse to visit the nearby viewpoint for a much needed cup of tea. I felt inspired to listen to the tape that he had of a reading with Diana Summer, following the events at the Stevie Wonder concert at the 02, and it provided much food for thought. During the reading, he also asked about my situation at work, and the underlying cause of the problems that I have been experiencing. The problems are not confined to my current job, for it is clear that this is a long standing pattern with practically every job I have ever had, that I need to break.

The following is a partial transcription from that tape:

"Fear is a powerful source of energy and can dominate and manipulate all other emotions. When it takes hold it has a life of its own. It speaks and has a consciousness that can cause the mental body, the emotional body to disregard reality and see things in a totally different way, in a more chaotic form. Reason is not given privy to consult, for the fear drives it out. Fear is a driving force and can drive the soul to distraction, taking away all sense of security, stability and safety, causing a feeling of being all but dismembered, as if one is in pieces. So, fear can be a very difficult bedfellow.

The fear in the consciousness globally is mounting. This has been caused by mankind's need to expand on any given drama and feed it to the masses in order that the masses soak it up, absorb it and take on the fear, and therefore be more vulnerable and more open to control. Nothing is quite what it seems, for there are other things at play here. There are other lines of communication actively at work. It is to do with the new world order, it is to do with controlling the masses, and there is the hidden agenda.

The situation occurring around June is one where she herself has been in the creative gaze of you moving through change; all the changes you have moved through are reflected on to her and now she is moving through her own fear, fear of not being heard, fear of not being seen, fear of not being honoured, fear of not being acknowledged, fear of not being respected. And this indeed is her experience now, of dealing with her own femininity, her inner male and female.

The pattern she has created has just been repeating, because strong though she is in many ways, there is a resistance to standing up for her rights, a resistance to truly expressing her needs in a way that she will be heard. Because speak as she might, voice her feelings as she does, it comes from a place that doesn't resonate and is not heard and therefore is not acknowledged. The intention behind the words expressed needs to come from deep in the heart, but the words when they are being expressed at the moment are coming from an aspect that is disempowered and therefore not having impact.

This disempowerment is to do with her own fearful issues. It is around the mental body, and sometimes she will 'pop out' because there is always an easier way of dealing with things when you can extricate and not be responsible. So bringing it back into the heart centre and speaking from the heart, quietly, concisely, will have far greater impact on those that she wishes to listen to her, and then she will be heard, because from the heart spoken with true sense of feeling and not from need.

Need is a different vibration, need is a lower vibration and is therefore resisted, but coming from the heart shifts the perspective and it opens the door for people to listen and she will be heard.

It is a simple thing and yet it is a very difficult one. Simple yes in explanation, but difficult to take on board, difficult to truly comprehend. But these lessons then that beset her are to show her that need as an emotion doesn't resonate. In truth when it comes from grace, when it comes from an unconditional heart centred intent then things will change. That doesn't mean one has to be quiet and not put the effort into communication, it is that it is coming from a different place, not from disempowerment, but from the place of authority within her. It is her own sense of power and the power needs to rise up into the heart so that she may speak from there, readily, freely and openly."

As I listened to this, sitting in the car the National Trust Centre with the windows slightly open, I was struck by the beauty of my surroundings. It was a sunny autumn day, with a slight chill in the air, the sort of day when the wind picks up the leaves and the dust and teases them, tossing them playfully into the air and setting them lightly down like feathers. It brought to mind the discussion last night and the work that we did with Libra, and I realised that wind is an aspect of air, the element to which Libra belongs. So I pushed back the seat, opened the windows a little wider, locked the doors and closed my eyes to bathe in the warmth of the sun, and to feel the wind on my face.

Reading through the notes I made from Diana's tape, it came as a shock revelation to discover that rather than the job being the problem, all the time it has been me. All those years I spent at home, pretending to be a writer, provided the perfect excuse for me to hide away and not face the fact that it was I who needed to change.

To quote from my wonderful partner:

"During this journey called Life, we grow from embryos to infants to children to adults moving from event to event, situation to situation, person to person. Sometimes we will stall over a particular circumstance or event that throws us into turmoil creating pain and anguish, always some anger and a myriad of other emotions that we perceive as positive or negative.

These events can appear to us like the proverbial Sword of Damocles, but in reality, our reality, they provide us with the greatest opportunities for the transformation of us as individuals, and ultimately society as a whole. We cannot change society however, until we realise that we can only do this by first being willing to change ourselves. Change is probably the most powerful force in our Universe, for without it there would be no evolution. Change is also the biggest fear that everyone has to face.

If we have the courage to confront our fears about change by learning to face them and move through them, we can overcome all that is presented to us. By confronting our fears we can learn to perceive these myriad of situations in a very different light. Thus, if we choose to view life as a series of learning experiences rather than a series of obstacles in our path, we can and will grow emotionally, mentally and spiritually and find and cultivate many of the undiscovered resources inside ourselves. Nurturing these resources will assist us in many ways in confronting the tasks that we will continue to meet. The more resources we have at our disposal the easier it becomes to deal with what is presented to us.

Change is the energy that propels us to move forward through our chosen tasks and lessons we have elected to deal with during this current incarnation. Most people, in fact all of us at some time or another, fight this change because it means we have to move into areas we do not understand or know very little about.

Fear is the motivator that prevents us from reacting to this change favourably. We resist change because it prompts us to look at ourselves more closely, probably more closely than ever before. The events that challenge us are designed to make us stare at our most difficult emotions, and usually this is anger.

Even though we may be in some pain and discomfort about the situation we find ourselves in, it is familiar. We take that familiarity as comfort, for we know it and, in some way, may understand it. For staying where we are, we believe, is the easy option, is the path of least resistance. Why would anyone choose to move from their comfort zone to a place that represents the unknown? Is it really easier to deal with the familiarity of our constant pain and of staying where we are? We believe that the future is made up of those events and experiences we have had in the past and we believe that is all we will experience again. Why? Fear of the unknown is why. The choice of travelling into the unknown, the mysterious, the undefined, the future uncertain, is definitely a difficult one to make but one that is, without doubt, the right one. The future may be vague and indefinable but is not cast in stone; we make of it what we will."